Creating the life of your dreams is something each of us can accomplish. The foundation of a healthy mindset opens possibilities and opportunities for building success in any area of your life. These skills breakdown into two categories:
Experiment with the following concepts. Don't try to do all of this at once. Make any one of these a daily practice or habit and your life will change; they are that powerful.
Take responsibility for your own mood. This principle is about you keeping the quality of life you want to live in your own hands. We’ve all had the experience of someone yelling or saying something sharp or cutting. How fast will you regain your composure, how fast will you rise back to your feet, brush yourself off, and step back into the mood you want to live your life with. If you let your mood be dependent on the circumstances around you, if you can only be happy if things are going the way you want, then you’re giving up on way too much of the goodness in life. You cannot control most of what goes on around you in this world, but you can control what goes on inside. How different would your life be if you choose to rise every day? Choosing your own mood is something we all have the power to do. Choosing happiness and gratitude is a habit that will bring incredible quality to every day.
Take responsibility for your relationships. You have a real choice about how you relate to those you are closest to. “What if you were 100% responsible for all your relationships?” Not 50/50, it’s all you, baby. That means that you can use tools like
It’s not about your “rights;” you’re not entitled. It’s all a gift. This is not simply about saying, “thank you” when you get something. When you view everything you have as a gift, your appreciation and pleasure in life will soar. Think about this: Would you rather be with someone who is demanding of you or who appreciates what you do? What’s the attitude that would open you to give more? Seeing all of life as a gift is a mindset that strengthens you in several ways.
Keep your hopes high and your expectations flexible. There’s an expression that may help with balance in the way we react to things. “Hope for the best but prepare for the worst.” We want life to go well, and sometimes we have those days when all seems right. “This, too, shall pass.” It’s not just the hard stuff that will pass; the juicy stuff has a pulse of expansion and contraction also. This mindset helps you take action toward the best results and at the same time gives you the power to release what didn’t happen the way you wanted. When you can let go of the expectations of what “should” happen, your mind is free to explore a different route and instead of getting stuck in disappointment, your mind is free to take in the learning and your emotions are free to choose joy or gratitude, or both.
Be grateful—especially when things are not going your way. Gratitude is actually a doorway to receiving more. This works in two ways, from the inside (how you feel about what you receive in life) and from the outside (givers are gratified when receivers are grateful). The inside job is where you train your own attitude every day in the smallest and grandest of ways to say thank you for what is. This doesn’t mean you are complacent, it means you are content. You still take action for building the life you want and at the same time you enjoy the process instead of demanding that things must be a certain way in your timing. There’s a big picture that we don’t have access to. From the outside: Have you ever given someone a gift and they tossed it to the side in disgust? It doesn’t make you want to give them more. You don’t have to fake liking something if that sends the wrong message, but expressing sincere gratitude for the effort and love that went into a gift is, at the very least, good manners. Everything you have in life is a gift, from your Creator and from the people around you. Whether it’s a meal, a smile, or knowledge, the mindset of gratitude will open you to receiving more and will put you in a place of peace. Extra Credit: try to be grateful for the negative experiences too. Experiment with that and watch your joy grow even more exponentially!
The world is plotting to make you better. Some people start with the assumption that everyone is “out to get them.” It’s likely they’ve been hurt or taken advantage of in the past so they live life in a defensive way. Assuming the world is plotting to make you better is not about closing your eyes and abandoning your boundaries. Coming from the place that you assume the world is out to make your life better is about looking for—and attracting—more good into your life. Even when a situation seems to go all wrong, you’re actually being given a life lesson. If you are willing to receive even the hard lessons life brings as gift, if you’re open to understanding and learning, you will see new ways to make the choices that will serve you in creating the results you truly want.
Make someone else happy. Service will lift you. Service, thinking about others and the difference you can make in their lives will get you out of the dumps in your own world and gives meaning to life. That could be to your family, friends, or community. Service can be a kind word, and helpful action, or a monetary donation. Service can be helping someone with their groceries, or giving an apple or a protein bar to the beggar outside the grocery store. Service can be listening to a friend, just listening. The idea is getting outside of your own situation, stepping about from your own frustrations or challenges in life and giving to someone else. Volunteer possibilities abound. Contribute. No matter how down or troubled you may be feeling, look outside yourself and find a way to give to others. Don’t expect gratitude; just serve because while you’re bringing goodness to those around you, you’ll find you’re building yourself at the same time. Taste the pleasure of making someone else happy.
You can do this!
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Watch this short video called "Can You Trust Your Eyes?" and then keep reading
So now you understand that your eyes give information to your brain and your brain fills in more information. Only you've just seen that even when something is provable, that doesn't mean you'll see it as it is.
What if our other perceptions were like that too? What if you think something is one way but in fact, it might not be at all? Maybe you can use this to your advantage.
What I'm trying to get to is a sort of "fake it 'til you make it" kind of thinking, or perhaps "reframing". If you can bring yourself more peace and well being on the inside by allowing yourself to know that perhaps there is a "benefit of the doubt" to a situation that is causing you mental or emotional anguish. Perhaps you can even imagine your way out of mental or emotional pain.
Can you think of ways you can use this idea to give yourself the gift of freedom? What you thought was dark grey was really light grey visually, so maybe what you thought was not so nice, could really turn out to have a big benefit for you?
What are the ways you can think of to use this idea to make some area of your life happier?
Let me know,
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Aunt Laya inspires and encourages you to live the life you want for yourself!