Aunt Laya

How to Block Unwanted Thoughts

8/23/2016

Everyone has negative or unwanted thoughts that come to mind. The thing is, you don't have to let your thoughts run away with you!

You get to be in control of your own thoughts. You can invite and allow thoughts that serve you, that inspire you, that ignite the sparks of joy, that motivate you to move forward or to build your dreams. And you can reject or block the negative thoughts or "voices" (you know what I mean, like when you hear the voice of some bully who put you down going into re-play mode in your mind).

One technique you can uses is to relate to these thoughts the same way you might if it was a sales call coming in on your cell phone. You can see the caller ID and you don't have to waste your time on it. Just don't answer.

Another technique is to visualize something like what The Good Witch of the North said to the Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard of Oz. "You have no power here. Be gone!"

Just say it over and over.

It's a good idea to have a few positive thoughts or visualizations to fill in the place of the thought you're shooing away. How about picturing (or actually eating!) your favorite fruit? How about remembering that beautiful note that your dear friend wrote you in junior high, or last week? Or the smile of someone who loves you. Or... you fill in the blank.

You can do this!
Love,
Aunt Laya

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Sweetest Picture Book

7/4/2016

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I How many ways can you tell your child "I love you"? Everyone needs love and connection. Every child needs and wants to hear they are loved, over and over again. This book will give you the words to open imaginations and hearts. In print at last, you can order your collectors, hard cover copy today. Check it out here.

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Waiting is Good

3/29/2016

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Someone posted this quote in a hospital's emergency waiting room. This is called a "paradigm shift." What does that mean? Someone could sit in the emergency room and complain about how no one is attending to them. OR, the same person might sit in the emergency room and feel grateful that their injury is not worse!! What a powerful way to tweak our experience of life.

Sometimes it seems like we are in such a get-it-NOW world and that if you have to wait for anything it's cause to get impatient. Of course you have every right to be impatient, but how will it really serve you?

Think about some things that are really good to wait for:

When a baby is gestating in his mother's belly, we don't want him to "hurry up." We want him to stay put until those lungs are fully formed and really ready to do their job.
In wanting love in your life, you can rush into relationships or connections that leave you feeling emptier, or you can wait until you really find a partner that you can build a life with.
Financially, the people that wait and save up their money for the big purchase, live with deeper peace because they paid cash and have no debt hanging over them.

Self restraint can be a great thing. How can you apply this to your life? What do you get impatient about? How can waiting be a good thing?

Wait for it...

Love and blessings,
Aunt Laya

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Leave comments! :-)

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A Picture Book Worth 1000 Snuggles

2/20/2016

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Share the love!

Here's my newest book!! This sweet picture book brings comfort and gently, joyfully builds bonds. Everyone loves to hear how much they are loved. Toddler, parent, and grandparent tested, this book guarantees smiles.

Follow Frog and Duck throughout their day from the morning sunshine to sweet dreams.

I invite you to help bring this book to into your home. Head over to the Kadina Press website for your very own copy. Some people are saying it's destined to be a classic.

I appreciate your help in sharing this special book with people in your circle who would love to have a snuggle and a smile with the little ones in their lives. Click the button below to learn more about I Love You So Much.

I want to see more!

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Getting Through the Hard Times

9/2/2015

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Sometimes life sends you a whammy and it doesn't feel good at all! Someone says something that hurts, or looks at you in a way that stings. Sometimes people are rude, or the project you're working on isn't working out. Or maybe you worked hard on something and it seems like every obstacle that could possibly show up, does--and then some! Hard stuff.

Hang on! Take a deep breath.

This is a test, it is only a test. The purpose of the test is to help you grow. The 'Universe', God, Spirit, your Higher Power, what ever you want to call it, is sending you a lesson so that you can become stronger and grow.

It doesn't matter who you are, what you do, how much you weigh, how tall you are, male, female, or how old you are. It doesn't matter if you are experienced or not. Life will send you lessons and they will NOT be comfortable.

And guess what? That's OK! It really is. Because if you're reading this right now, I'm here to tell you, you can get through this test and you can use this experience to make you stronger. You can use any experience to your advantage and flourish in AMAZING ways. Amazing! Do you hear me? Amazing! I'm not exaggerating.

What ever tests life presents you with are there for a reason. In the end even the hardest stuff will turn out to be for the best because you'll be a better person. You can learn and grow and you are always stronger in the end, even if it doesn't feel like that's possible right now.

When you find yourself in one of the 'tests' of life, hang in there. If you don't 'get it' the first time around, it will come around again and you can catch the lesson the next round.

All along the way, remember that you are not alone. Everyone else is being tested, sometimes the same tests, sometimes different, but we're all tested. Even the people who look like they have it all together... you'd be amazed at the stories each one of us carries.

You can handle anything that comes your way. Keep breathing, ask for help when you need it. Be good to you and those around you.

With lots of love and some cyber (((((hugs))))) too!
Aunt Laya

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What if money were no object?

4/26/2015

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Ready for a little game? What if you had all the money you could dream of? What would you be doing differently in your life? What would you spend that money on? A wonderful exercise to do is to make a list of all the things you would do.

There are two ways to play with on this one.

First of all, if you plan your finances well (would you like a link to a program that will help with that?), you can do anything you want. Not everything you want but pretty much what ever goals you have, you can save for the top most important or fulfilling money goals.

Also, if you play this out, you may notice that there's a pattern of a kind of experience you want in life. You might find a pattern that leads you on a creative path. Many people find that they are interested in leaving a positive mark in the world with some kind of service.

As you look at each item on your list, ask yourself what the experience is that you're looking for. Then ask yourself, "How can I achieve that experience in my life right now?"

As a young woman I had an experience of giving that changed my life. I didn't have a lot but I had more than a young couple I met and I was able to give to them in a way that was sweet and surprising to them and at the same time, something that I could afford. It changed the way I looked at giving.

You don't have to wait "until" you have enough time, money, energy or what ever. You can start right now, right from where you are. The idea here is to fine tune what would mean the most to you and then go for it.

It doesn't happen all at once. But one step at a time and you'll be living the life of your dreams.

So what's one small step you can take right now?

love,
Aunt Laya

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Things my Dad taught me

3/12/2015

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My father at his 90th birthday party

My father lived to age 95. He was often asked for his advice on living a long and good life. Here are a few nuggets of the beautiful wisdom I garnered from the things my father taught me and lived.

The most frequent response I heard from my father in response to the question about living a healthy, long life was “Be positive.” What does that mean? Respond to every situation in life looking for the good. Look for the good in others and speak to that. Looking on the bright side will change your physiology and actually promotes health. So, backed by science, a good key to a long, healthy life is to be positive.

What ever else was happening around him, my father tried to respond with patience and kindness. My father was born in New York in 1915. When he was a little boy, he was swinging his feet while sitting on a bench and the old man sitting next to him on the bench snapped at him to sit still and stop banging on the bench. At that moment, as a little boy, he put himself on a trajectory of kindness. He decided right there to be nice. Being nice will always serve. Some may mistake kindness for weakness. Be kind anyway.

My father took vitamins and ate well. He also ate cookies regularly. He never overindulged, just a couple at a time. If he drank alcohol, it was one shot. The great Rambam was a doctor and a sage. He teaches moderation. My father walked the walk: Be moderate: enjoy what life has to offer without over doing.

After moving away from my parents’ home, whenever I came to visit my father would check to make sure my windshields were clean. He’d clean them if they weren’t. He taught me: keep your windows and the headlights of your car clean too; you’ll have better visibility. It’s safer to drive when you can see clearly. It’s a great metaphor for all of life. Keep your own perspective clear and you’ll see what’s happening around you more clearly.

Each one of those tips has served me well. I share them with you today, the anniversary of his passing, to lift our spirits a little bit, and in so doing, honor his memory.

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Tool for Life--Reframing

2/4/2015

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"If at first you don't succeed,
redefine success!"

This quote made me smile. It's the perfect quote to demonstrate the life tool and skill you can develop for keeping your mindset positive. It is called "Reframing". You can use this tool for the way you relate to your own life and also how you relate to others. (I'll share how I personally used this way of thinking at the end of this post.)

You get to decide how you want to frame your life and your perceptions. Kind of like when you take a photograph. You choose what to focus on. In life, you decide what to focus on! You decide who is in the picture and who is out. You decide what you want to photograph--you decide what to put energy into, and how you want to do that.

Then once you have taken your photo--or once something has already happened in your life--you decide how you want to view it in your mind. To open up your thoughts on this one, take a minute to understand how a frame on a picture really makes a difference:

If you have never taken anything to a frame shop, now would be a good time to head on out to one just to have a look at how the process works.
You can see ideas of the way things can look in different frames and how many different kinds of frames and matts you can choose from. The environment you place your picture in is also like a frame.

So how do you apply this in your life? Let's say you set the goal of hiking up a mountain. At the end of the day, you didn't make it to the top of the mountain. Now you get to choose the way you want to frame the day.
You could say to yourself: Wow, what a great day, I saw wonderful sites, climbed higher than I ever have before, and had a nice time.
OR
You could say to yourself: What a failure, I never even got to the top of the mountain.

What attitude will serve you the best? What attitude will help you enjoy the life you are living?

Here's another way you can use reframing: A child says "I hate you" to his parent. The parent can say to himself "Oh, I'm a failure as a parent!" OR "This kid is tired and needs a nap." OR "What can I do to help my child understand this situation?" In this situation you can use reframing to give another person the benefit of the doubt. You can do that if you're the kid too. Say your parents yell at you "for no reason". It could be that they are actually having a bad day! Poor, poor parents. They are doing the best they can.

And, you're allowed to give your own self the benefit of the doubt too! You are doing the best you can. When you make a mistake (or your parents or your kids or anyone) know that you (and they) are doing the best you can.

I used to be athletic. I was on a fencing team, on a swim team, and I was a martial artist. I've since been diagnosed with MS (multiple sclerosis) and it really effected my balance and the way I can exercise. I could cry and cry about it, or I can redefine what a successful day of exercise is. I choose to celebrate what I can accomplish. It's such a happier place to be.

Bottom line: You can choose the thoughts and perspective that you want. I hope you'll choose well in ways that will help you grow and find peace.

You can do this!

Love,
Aunt Laya

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Watch this funny video

12/8/2014

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I love this video.

Use everything you have going on in your life for the good...

Did you watch the video? It's funny. Watch it.

Love,
Aunt Laya

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Quit Complaining

12/1/2014

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Tough love.

I love you enough to tell you the truth. Complaining doesn't do a dang thing. Complaining won't make your life better. In fact, it will drag you down, down, down into the depths of deeper crap.

We all know that hard things happen in life. There are things in life worth crying about. The loss of a loved one, you have to grieve. The loss of a pet, you need to grieve. But mostly crying about what is wrong with your life doesn't fix it. It doesn't lift you, and it doesn't make things different.

NEWS FLASH... Unhappiness does not bring happiness!!!

Blowing off steam is over rated. I've tried it thinking it might have some value is helping to get past things that have upset me. It just increases the upset to go over things again and again. YOU HAVE TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT.

Want love in your life? Don't cry about being lonely, JOY is what will attract love.

Want success in your life? No more waaa waaa waaa! Imagine the most successful people you know--what ever the area of success--and I'll bet you don't hear a lot of whining from them.

Complaining is a habit that you have to change. It will not be comfortable and it may not be easy. It may even take some effort. Like the effort to look around your life and find a reason a day to be happy.

Create a new habit of noticing and acknowledging things that will make you feel good. This is a place to start. You can do this!

Love,
Aunt Laya

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How to Block Unwanted Thoughts

Sweetest Picture Book

Waiting is Good

A Picture Book Worth 1000 Snuggles

Getting Through the Hard Times

What if money were no object?

Things my Dad taught me

Tool for Life--Reframing

"If at first you don't succeed,
redefine success!"

Watch this funny video

Quit Complaining

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Aunt Laya

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"If at first you don't succeed,
redefine success!"